


Don't Do It

by isychiae



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: 3 Jocky Father Figures have a barbecue to fix their traumatised teenage son, Angst with a Happy Ending, Clint is a good dad, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, May is trying so so so hard but nothing is working uwu, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Mess, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, References to Depression, References to Drugs, Sam is Very Awkward, Therapy, at least peter gets a nice bedroom, burn-out, i havent watched the recent marvel movies uwu im such a fake fan, not compliant with far from home, these tags are so depressing wtf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 18:01:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28532574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isychiae/pseuds/isychiae
Summary: “I’m gonna do it.”“You are?”“I’m gonna ask MJ to the dance.”Peter doesn’t get that far.*After Endgame, Peter is struggling with adjusting to life without Tony in a world that has left him behind, and a desperate May sends him to live with the New Avengers for the summer in an attempt to put him back on the right track. Angst (with a happy ending) ensues.
Relationships: Clint Barton & Peter Parker, James "Bucky" Barnes & Sam Wilson, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Sam Wilson & Peter Parker
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	Don't Do It

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back! I haven't been involved in fandom for over a year because of school and other things (namely, coronavirus), but I wanted to get back into writing fic, so here's an idea that's been knocking around my skull for a little while. Lemme know if you want more! Oh, and the next chapter of 'Keep Me in Your Arms' is currently being written hehehe.

“I’m gonna do it.”

“You are?”

“I’m gonna ask MJ to the dance.”

*

Peter doesn’t get that far. He falls apart (literally) and the pieces don’t get glued back together in quite the same way they used to be. Teenage romance feels a little futile having experienced the undoing of his very being. It doesn’t hold the same allure it used to. He shelfs his love for MJ and tries to ignore the disappointed glare she casts towards him the morning after prom.

There’s a couple of months where Peter tries to return to some sense of normalcy. May manages a lot better than he does, and in some odd way Peter is almost grateful that she was swept up in the snap – he doesn’t think he could bear the guilt knowing she had endured five years of grief on his part. They’re both on the same page, on the same turf, and it’s surprisingly simple for them to slot back into the newly-bolstered bustle of Queens.

For a split-second, it feels as though they might have a somewhat happy ending.

No such luck.

Peter barely realises he’s spiralling until his math teacher stages an intervention after he leaves in the middle of class for the third time in a row that week. It’s not that his grades are suffering – he’s been cruising around the low A’s for a while now – but they’re beginning to slide dangerously into getting-kicked-out-of-extension-classes territory. She doesn’t want to see Peter waste his potential, which is probably a testament to his character, but dread still settles firmly in his chest when he returns home with a letter for May.

Fast forward through several tearful heart-to-hearts, a couple of awkward meetings with the principal and a handful of stern phone calls, it’s decided that Peter will spend the rest of the year completing his classes online. It’s a relief, and Peter manages to scrape up a 3.6 GPA between eighteen-hour naps and playing dumb to May’s pitying stare.

Everyone around him had hoped that Peter would be able to pull himself together after seeing his own success, but instead he crashes harder than he had before. Passing class appears to have awarded him a licence to withdraw back into a comatose state.

Peter begins to swing back and forth between insomnia and days spent asleep, whilst tv network hosts speculate on the whereabouts of a long-absent Spiderman. He migrates from his bed to the ratty armchair in the corner of the sitting room, staring out of the window and ignoring the fiftieth missed call from Ned.

Eventually the calls stop, and it hurts Peter a hell of a lot more than it should.

*

Two months since Spiderman’s disappearance, Sam comes calling at the Parker residence. In the wake of Tony’s death and Steve’s ‘departure’, leadership fell into Wilson’s lap, and he bears it surprisingly well.

He happens to arrive during one of those few instances where Peter has made it out of the apartment, and Sam is instead greeted by an overwhelmed May.

“Hey, Mrs Parker? I’m looking for Peter. We haven’t heard from him in a while.”

There’s an awkward kind of tension that settles between them, and for a moment Sam feels as though something has gone very, very wrong, especially when he looks beyond May’s drawn face and into the empty room behind her.

“Peter’s out. For the moment.”

A silence stretches between them, and Sam resists the urge to dither. He’s still warming up to the whole ‘being-responsible-for-the-most-powerful-people-on-the-planet’ thing.

“Come in, I’m sure he’ll be back in a bit.” May offers, stepping aside.

Sam nods, smiling in a somewhat futile attempt to diffuse the unease between them, allowing himself to be led into the sitting room. He takes note of the laptop and blanket lying bundled together on the armchair by the window.

“Sorry, to impose like this Mrs Parker, I just needed to discuss some of our next steps as a team, considering the. . . re-jig in our roster.”

May only appears to be half-listening, worrying her lower lip.

“That’s very understandable,” She replies hesitantly, and Sam waits before answering her, hoping to coax a little more out of her.

“You’re not going to. . . to kick him out, are you?”

Sam frowns.

“No, not at all, I just wanted to check in-“

“Sorry, it’s just that I know he hasn’t been placing superhero-ing as his top priority-“

“I get it, the school year just ended, life can get in the way, especially with everything going on. . .” A synapse fires, and Sam finally understands May’s expression.

“He hasn’t done anything wrong, Mrs Parker.”

She visibly deflates.

“Oh, thank god.”

Sam sighs, rubbing a hand over his face.

“To be honest, I’m really here because worried about him. He hasn’t really been in much contact with any of us, which is perfectly understandable, but I just wanted to make sure he’s. . . doing ok.”

May opens her mouth, pauses, and closes it again. Sam waits for her answer, leaning forwards to rest his elbows on his thighs.

“I don’t know if Peter would want me saying this to you, but I just- I just don’t _get_ the burden he’s carrying, and as much as I’ve tried to I- I _can’t_ understand it.”

Sam nods, a little surprised.

“Go on.”

“So if you can do _anything_ to help. . . I don’t know, pull him out of this- this _slump_ , then please, do it.”

*

By the time Peter returns from Delmar’s, it has been decided that he’s leaving Queens for the summer to spend some time at the New Avengers Base upstate. To say it was a shock to find the new-and-improved Captain America in his living room would be putting it _lightly_ , and Peter had immediately jumped to the conclusion, much like his aunt, that he had in fact been dropped from the team, prompting an embarrassing slew of apologies that are better left forgotten.

On the other hand, it appears May was so smitten with the idea of Peter leaving (he tries not to take it personally but considering the hell he’s put her through in the past six months, he probably deserves it) she’s already packed a duffle bag for him, with tentative plans for a dressed-down SHIELD car to pick him up the next morning.

He has half a mind to argue but ends up vaguely tearful and spaced out, setting Sam extremely off-kilter. There’s something mentioned about therapy and Clint and ‘further arrangements’ before Sam is sweeping out the door, leaving Peter leaning shell-shocked on the kitchen counter.

He can feel the beginnings of something akin to anger bubbling under his skin, and scrabbles into his bedroom to avoid May and the inevitable shouting-match that would ensue had he stayed to hear her out.

Peter knows deep down that the burden he’s placing on her is more than unfair, but that doesn’t stop him from imagining a hundred scenarios where he wins the argument and is allowed to remain triumphant in his spot on the armchair.

Nevertheless, he tries to push the tears down when he hears the familiar creaking of floorboards as May stops to listen by his bedroom door, slowly sliding his window open to sit on the cold iron of the fire escapes, trying to ride out the latest wave of panic.

Not for the first time, he falls asleep out there, cheek pressed against freezing iron, fleece blanket caught on the corner of the windowsill.

Sunshine wakes him up, peeking through a swathe of faded concrete.

**Author's Note:**

> So, here's the first chapter! Sorry, I know it's super short but I just wanted to set everything up. Lemme know what you think and I'll incorporate feedback as I write more!!!!!


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